Toilet Training: A Play in Several Acts (Act I)

Kidlet: Poop! Potty?
Amy: You need to poop?
Kidlet: [nods enthusiastically, walks to bottom of stairs] Potty!
Amy: [scoops up kidlet and carries her up to the bathroom] Okay. Ready to sit on the potty?
Kidlet: [shrieks] Nooooo! [begins to cry]
Amy: [confused] Do you have to poop?
Kidlet: [crying real tears] No!
Amy: Did you already poop?
Kidlet: [shaking head] No! [crying]
Amy: Can I look?
Kidlet: [turns her back to Amy and leans forward slightly for a diaper check]
Amy: [checks diaper, finds it empty] Do you want to sit on the potty?
Kidlet: No! [runs toward stairs]
Amy: [still confused] Okay, then [carries kidlet downstairs and deposits her on the couch]
Kidlet: Poop! Potty?

[Director's Note: Scene is repeated approximately 15 times for dramatic effect]

1 comment:

Dr. Brokeback said...

Dear suburban lesbian mom:

My two nurse friends who are lesbians who live in the 'burbs are preggers. I feel like you should warn them, at least about the poop thing before it's too late. Their blog:


It's called "gin-soaked olive," which is reflective of their pre-pregnancy (as opposed to current) priorities, I feel.